Pondering

Does anyone else feel gloomy on Sundays?  I know I shouldn't because it's a day of worship and rest, but lately I've been getting a sense of dread.  Isn't that awful?  I dread the week to come because that's when everyone goes back to work and the craziness ensues all over again.  I mourn for the two days of free time that have almost expired.  Quite frankly, I'm sad that my husband has to go back to work and won't be able to hang out with me and the baby.

In the past, this would be the week that I return to work.  I'd begin making lessons plans, arranging my desks, setting up my grade book, putting up a bulletin board, and a million other things that a teacher does to prepare for their students' arrival.  It's an exciting, stressful, and nerve-wracking week.  I won't miss the anxiety, but I will miss that feeling of being part of a team and that sense of being part of something.  I'll miss the teachers that I smiled at every morning for the last eight years.  I'll miss my former students stopping by to say hi, and to tell me how much they hate their new teachers.  I'll miss the look on my new students faces when I tell them a corny or sarcastic joke, and they stare back at me totally confused.  Most of all, and this is a real slap in the face; I'm going to miss that paycheck.  I was good at what I did, and I worked hard at it.  People tell me that the school community doesn't know what it lost when the budget cut me out, but the thing is, it wouldn't matter even if they did.  What's done is done. No one single person or community controls the economy.

It's not just this particular Sunday that I've felt so gloomy, it's been off and on all summer.  The one thing that has made me feel better is this new blog.  It's an outlet.  I've always wanted to write, so I finally am.  Even if I'm not that great at it yet, I'll get better.  Despite the sense of loss, I truly believe this is where I belong now, being a good mother, and sharing my discoveries and misadventures with readers.

With that doom and gloom out of my system, I'm going to spend the remaining hours hanging out with my family.  To make things more positive, why don't you tell me about something good that went on this weekend?  I had banana bread french toast yesterday, and it was TDF.  To Die For.
-Katie Lou